History of Wolves, Emily Fridlund
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Emily Fridlund

History of Wolves

Lezen
Котик II
Котик IIciteerde uitvorig jaar
Here’s the thing about Mr. Grierson. I’d seen how he crouched down next to Lily’s desk. I’d seen how he said, “You’re doing fine,” and put his hand very carefully, like a paperweight, on her spine. How he lifted his fingertips and gave her a little pat.
Котик II
Котик IIciteerde uitvorig jaar
On the morning of the History Odyssey tournament, I sawed a branch from the old pine behind our house.
Котик II
Котик IIciteerde uitvorig jaar
She looked up into the air, then very slowly wiped her palms on her canvas pockets.
Котик II
Котик IIciteerde uitvorig jaar
Nights, I went out in mukluks, a ski mask, and my father’s down jacket, which was redolent with his scents, with tobacco and mildew and bitter coffee.
Котик II
Котик IIciteerde uitvorig jaar
Because my parents didn’t own a car, this is how I got home when I missed the bus.
Котик II
Котик IIciteerde uitvorig jaar
By the time I got home, it was dark.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
Before, she’d always emphasized how young they’d been then, how ignorant and misguided. But she hadn’t been young she told me now. She was thirty-three, long past her high school and college years. Everything she did, she did when she should have known better.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
So many people, even now, admire privation. They think it sharpens you, the way beauty does, into something that might hurt them. They calculate their own strengths against it, unconsciously, preparing to pity you or fight.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
Surely, they said to me later, surely by then you sensed something was off?

Maybe. Maybe there is a way to climb above everything, some special ladder or insight, some optical vantage point that allows a clear, unobstructed view of things. Maybe this way of seeing comes naturally to some people, and good for them if it does. But I remember it all, even now, as if two mutually exclusive things happened. First it goes the way the prosecutors described it—nausea, headache, coma, etcetera—and then it comes back to me the way it actually was with Patra and Paul—tall ships, car ride home, Good King Wenceslas, bed. Though they end the same way, these are not the same story. Maybe if I’d been someone else I’d see it differently. But isn’t that the crux of the problem? Wouldn’t we all act differently if we were someone else?
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
was one of those teachers who set up hidden traps. Like all teachers, he wanted me caught, but he wanted to lead me there first; he wanted me to go on my own accord; he wanted me to feel like I’d made the discovery myself, that I hadn’t been lured in.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
“What do you want from Lily the Polak? She’s a wee-wee sucker homo freak. You a homo, too, or something?”

I sighed. I’d fielded this question from boys like these all through grade school. It was often the worst accusation eight-year-olds could muster, and I was amply prepared from years of being taunted on the playground. “A Homo sapiens?” I asked, suggestively.

They shrugged, uncertain.

“I am. Yes.”

“Barf! Gross! Yuck!” they squealed.

They were delighted, though.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
By their nature, it came to me, children were freaks. They believed impossible things to suit themselves, thought their fantasies were the center of the world. They were the best kinds of quacks, if that’s what you wanted—pretenders who didn’t know they were pretending at all.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
“Oh, Hawaii,” I nodded. I tried to say it like I’d been there recently myself, and found the food disappointing, the locals unfriendly.
Tina
Tinaciteerde uitvorig jaar
It seemed unfair to me that people couldn’t be something else just by working at it hard, by saying it over and over.
Alisa-Natalia Loginova
Alisa-Natalia Loginovaciteerde uit2 jaar geleden
Lily had big brown eyes, dyslexia, no pencil, a boyfriend.
Alisa-Natalia Loginova
Alisa-Natalia Loginovaciteerde uit2 jaar geleden
He announced he’d double majored in theater in college, which explained why he stood in front of the class one day with his arms outstretched reciting the whole Declaration of Independence by heart. Not just the soaring parts about life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, but the needling, wretched list of tyrannies against the colonies. I could see how badly he wanted to be liked.
b3022423217
b3022423217citeerde uit3 jaar geleden
Not yet,” I sai
germisalon
germisalonciteerde uit3 jaar geleden
“That a Doors song?” one of the paramedics asked. He’d stayed behind to pass out packets of saltines to light-headed students.
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