Negotiate to Win

Be skeptical of an “I’ll try” from the other side. Try to get a real quid pro quo instead. If that’s not possible, ask for a firm commitment that kicks in if their “try” fails: “I’ll do my best, but if I can’t, I’ll do X, Y, and Z instead.”

Every request is an opportunity.

Try to avoid saying “no” to the other side. “Yes, if” is better.

Wait for it. Never waste a concession.

1. The big “if.” Negotiation isn’t about giving, it’s about trading. When the other side asks you for something, get in the habit saying “yes, if” instead of “yes” or “no.” Try to tie every concession you make to a specific quid pro quo from the other side. Spell out exactly what you want in return.

Concessions may be the sine qua non of haggling, but how can we make them without giving away the ranch in the process? How can we be flexible without being lunch? By doing the two most important things negotiators do. First, by getting something in return—trading our concessions, not just giving them away; and second, by doing the ’ol negotiating two-step: opening with an assertive offer, and then, as the talks progress, deliberately dropping back to our real target.