The Dalai Lama’s Book of Transformation

If we shift our focus from ourselves to others and to the wider world, and if we turn our attention to all the crises in the world, all the difficulties and the sufferings and so on, we will see that many of these problems are direct or indirect consequences of undisciplined negative states of mind. And where do these come from? From this powerful combination of self-centeredness and the belief in our independent existence. By shifting our attention to the wider world in this way, we can begin to appreciate the immensely destructive consequences of such thinking.

we try to probe deeper to understand what this aspiration to be free of suffering really implies. It does not arise from a sense of self-importance, or self-congratulation; such considerations simply do not play any role here at all. This basic aspiration arises in us simply by virtue of the fact that we are conscious living beings. Together with this aspiration comes a conviction that I, as an individual, have a legitimate right to fulfill my aspiration. If we accept this, then we can relate the same principle to others and we will realize that everyone else shares this basic aspiration too. Therefore, if I as an individual have the right to fulfill my aspiration, then others, too, have an equal right to fulfill theirs. It is on these grounds that one has to recognize the fundamental equality of all beings.

Someone may be a friend today but turn into an enemy tomorrow. This is especially true from the Buddhist point of view, when we take many lifetimes into account – someone who is very close to you in this life may have been your enemy in another. From this perspective there are no real grounds for feeling such strong attachment.